How to Set Boundaries While Still Keeping In Touch
Deciding to proceed with a divorce is one of the most difficult events that a person can go through. The guidance of a West Virginia divorce lawyer is needed to guide you through the process and help you to obtain the items that you want to receive after the divorce, spousal support that has been requested, and arrange an adequate child custody schedule for you and your children. Divorce attorneys are there to help you navigate each step of the divorce, along with aiding in negotiations between you and your spouse.
Be Cautious of Your Tone
Some issues should be discussed before obtaining divorce papers and especially throughout divorce mediation meetings when possible. Unless there is a reason for you to not communicate with your spouse at all, you should be able to resolve at least the minor issues that may arise, such as who is picking up your child from school, instead of trying to communicate through both of your lawyers.
Though you may be upset with your spouse, try to be cautious of your tone and remain cordial in order to resolve one issue at a time. Avoid bringing up the past and focus only on the issues that need to be settled. Don’t bring up problems that will cause you and your spouse to start arguing. In most scenarios, how you come across is remembered more so than what you say during these conversations.
Being careful about how you come across doesn’t just mean face-to-face, it means via email, phone call, text, or on social media. It may be a good idea to designate a daily cut-off time with your spouse so you can go about your day, or only contact one another without a lawyer present if there is a true emergency.
Establish Clear Boundaries
As you try to navigate through this process, try to set clear boundaries with your spouse. Talk about meeting in person to talk about the issue at hand, decide to only speak with attorneys present, or discuss how you both prefer communicating such as speaking over the phone.
If you must communicate through your attorney in order to reach your spouse, do so. Sometimes there are instances where your spouse may be bitter towards the divorce or hold resentment towards you if you try to communicate with him or her. Other situations like a restraining or protective order may prevent you from contacting your spouse. Discuss the best option with your divorce attorney before trying to reach out.
Additionally, be sure to avoid recording any conversations you may have with your spouse without their knowledge. Individuals seeking a divorce sometimes want to save conversations they’ve had with their spouse for their records during a divorce proceeding, but this could get you in trouble with both state and federal laws. Discuss any actions that you plan to take with your divorce lawyer before acting on any of them.
Contact a West Virginia Divorce Attorney
If you are considering a divorce or have just been served divorce papers, contact the attorneys at Hilliard and Swartz, LLP for legal consultation and representation. We are here for you and will be by your side throughout this entire process.